Pay Day
by CS091
Summary: It's Pay Day!! One shot bit of nonsense.


Disclaimers : The usual.  
  
Spoilers : None of any consequence.  
  
AN : Just a bit of nonsense   
  
  
"Hold the elevator, please, Sir!" Major Samantha Carter ran towards the elevator as Colonel Jack O'Neill held the door open for her.   
  
"Going down. Men's wear and electrical goods." He joked as the door shut behind her.   
  
"Could you make that the canteen, please, Sir." Sam replied breathlessly, "I've gotta get something to eat. I woke up late and didn't have time to get breakfast."  
  
"Mind if I join you, Major? I've got to pop into my office first, see if there's any mail. It is pay day, don't forget."   
  
"Oh, yeah. I'll check my in-tray. They usually leave my pay slip in my lab."  
  
20 minutes later they were both sitting at a table, eating breakfast. Fruit Loops for him, muesli for her.   
  
"Yea, my expenses got paid!" Jack examined his pay slip between mouthfuls. "Had a lot of out of pocket expenses during that last trip to D.C. I've been waiting for the money. That will go towards a new roof for the cabin! It's been leaking in the spare bedroom for a while now."  
  
"You never told me that the roof leaks, when you invite me to stay!"  
  
"Hey, you won't come up anyway. Do you really think I'm gonna tell you that you need to bring waterproof PJs as well?" He nodded at her payslip. "That increment come through this month?"  
  
"Yes, Sir, and the back-pay. Thank you for sorting that out with finance for me."  
  
"No problem. Anything to help my team! Talking about my team, there's Daniel. Hey, Danny, we're over here!"  
  
Dr. Daniel Jackson made his way over to their table, greeted his team mates and sat down. He, too, had his payslip and he opened it as he ate.  
  
Sam looked around for Teal'c to make the group complete, but there was no sign of him. She looked thoughtful.  
  
"Penny for them, Major." Jack had noticed her faraway look.  
  
"I was just thinking, Sir. You and I get paid as regular military personnel, Daniel is classed as US civilian consultant, but how is Teal'c paid?"  
  
"Is Teal'c paid, Jack?"  
  
Jack O'Neill looked awkward. "Actually, I don't know. When he first joined us, after Abydos, he was confined to the base. His accommodation, all his meals and his uniforms were provided for him. He didn't get out at first to need any money to spend."  
  
"Jack, he still lives on base. And his family are in the Land of Light. There isn't exactly a branch of the First National Bank there. Do you think he still isn't being paid?"  
  
Jack went pale. "God, I don't know! As his CO, I suppose I should have sorted it out, but it never ....Shit, I feel bad now!"  
  
"His house on Chulak was a gift from Apophis, Sir. I don't suppose Jaffa get paid by direct debit with pension, health insurance and tax deducted. He wouldn't have known what the usual thing is here. If you think about it, Sir, whenever we go out for a drink or anything, you nearly always pick up the tab. I can't remember Teal'c ever paying."  
  
"He's got some civilian clothes, though," Daniel countered, "He's got to have got them from somewhere."  
  
Jack was now red. "Umm, I went shopping with him when he needed some civvies for a mission. They were put through on my expenses."  
  
"Hell, Jack, do you mean to say Teal'c has been working for Uncle Sam for YEARS now, without him getting a penny for risking his life on a daily basis?"  
  
"Could be." Jack was really embarrassed. It was his job to sort these sort of things out. He tried to excuse himself. "It's not like your usual situation. Normally when I get a new team member, he's being paid already. Teal'c hasn't got a passport or a green card or National insurance number or anything."  
  
"Jack, you should have found out!"   
  
"YA THINK."  
  
"Sir, we could look at the payroll database." Both men turned sharply to look at Sam.  
  
"You can do that sort of thing, Major? Officially?" Jack emphasised her rank.  
  
"Well, no, Sir, not officially. But there are always back doors."  
  
"You've looked at MY payroll details?"  
  
It was Sam's turn to go red. "No, Sir, of course not."  
  
"I'd love to believe you!"  
  
"Hey, you two. This isn't answering the question in hand. Sam, can you look for Teal'c on the database."  
  
"Yes, I can look. But not finding him doesn't mean anything. He might be using a pseudonym."  
  
So they weren't surprised when 'Mr. Teal'c' didn't appear on the database. Or 'Mr. Apophis'. Or 'Mr. Chulak'. Or anything else they could think of.  
  
"You'll have to ask Teal'c, Jack."  
  
"Yeah. 'Excuse me Teal'c, have you been paid at all for the last four years?' Yeah, trips off the tongue! I should have sorted this out at the beginning!"  
  
"Well, you've GOT to sort it out now."  
  
Jack found Teal'c in his quarters. But, of course, he couldn't just come out and ask him straight.   
  
"Umm, Teal'c?"  
  
"Yes, O'Neill."  
  
"Umm, how's the wife and kid doing?"  
  
"They are doing very well, thank you, O'Neill"  
  
"They've got everything they want?"  
  
"The Land of Light is a pleasant planet to live on. They have everything they need, but it is not home. However, they must live with the consequences of my actions."  
  
"Anything we could do to make things easier?"  
  
"I believe I am doing all that is possible, O'Neill."  
  
"Umm, how do they get food and clothes and stuff?"  
  
"Oh, that is no problem, O'Neill. I buy gem stones, take them to the Land of Light and exchange them for anything my wife and son require."  
  
"You buy them? With what?"  
  
"General Hammond led me to believe all SGC personnel received payment for their service. Is this not the case? I do not want special treatment."  
  
"Oh, yeah. Everyone gets paid. You get a payslip and everything?"  
  
"Yes. General Hammond assisted me in setting up records like National Insurance details and a bank account. This seemed to be the best option for receiving payment."  
  
"In the name of Teal'c?"  
  
"No, General Hammond suggested 'Homer Simpson'." 


End file.
